Happy Merry Christmas

Japan (not being a western country and all) does the celebration of Christmas a lot differently- and sometimes not at all. First of all, the Japanese are quite lucky as Santa hangs around all year. After all, don't all white, overweight men with white beards all look like Santa? In this case Colonel Sanders gets to dress up and be Santa in the winter months and greet the Christmas shoppers with his merry smile (I love that the Japanese are still trustworthy enough to not only have the fibreglass statues, but they also don't have to be chained down).




and not only does he play the role of Santa- but a disturbing amount of Japanese people go to KFC on Christmas day (I have seen lines out the door and down the road) for their 'traditional' chicken Christmas lunch. Recently I have been having fun asking all my students about Christmas and what they do for it. Most will do nothing- but those that do may eat a Christmas cake (Not Xmas pudding, just a regular cake with a Christmas decorations), go to KFC or put up a pint sized tree (though, they will do nothing else Christmassy- just have a small plastic tree somewhere in the house)...



I too opted for the pint sized tree this year, as the few trees that they have over 1 meter are about $100 and there is a distinct lack of Christmas decorations around to purchase (some trees even come pre-decorated, as to co-ordinate appropriately- heaven forbid that it wouldn't). And while my mini tree is quite cute, I did have a  problem with being able to find a topper. That didn't stop me though. I decided that if I wanted to have a Christmas this year, then perhaps I was to make Christmas myself. You can see below my little tree with AWESOME, hand made angel.

 And this my Christmas wreath, like that ones that we used to make in primary school. All the neighbours have been commenting on it's awesomeness and is quite the conversation starter.
















While the Japanese Christmas isn't quite as traditional as I am used to, they still play Christmas music in the stores, have festive flavoured food, and decorations in the shopping centres. Plus, I have the awesome feeling of waking up to a winter wonderland on Christmas morning, and that is something to be very merry about.

So, as the Japanese say- Happy Merry Christmas everyone!

Mis-adventures in a Japanese hospital

This week one of my students gave me a present- Tonsillitis (yay!)

Or at least- that is what WEBMD has diagnosed me as having. I know, getting medical advice from a computer might not be the safest- especially as I may also have signs of a myriad of other diseases too. Not to mention my track record of self-diagnosis hasn't been exactly on par over the years (like the time I thought I was reacting to a spider bite- but it was actually shingles).



I hear what your saying- why not just go to a doctor to find out what is going on with my throat. After all, it does feel like I have been swallowing razor blades at 4am, for the last 6 days. Well, in Japan they do things a little different...


When people are sick, they do not go to the doctor, instead most go to the hospital. In fact now that I think about it, I have seen very few doctors offices around. Plenty of dentists and 'lady clinics', but a distinct lack of the reliable ol' GP. The most annoying thing about the hospital (besides the drama over something that would clear itself up in a week or two) is that it's a 30min drive away.  The last time I went to the hospital was with my chicken and sweet corn soup burns, and while I thought it was a bit of an over reaction at the time, the nurse in Triage didn't think so after she saw the welts... I still have little brown, chicken shaped scar tissue over my chest and have to eat soup with a bib for fear of triggering a bout of post traumatic stress... but I digress.

The other problem with being unwell in Japan is their severe lack of working medication. There isn't quite the hard core, over the counter drugs like you get back home, the kind you could make drugs with (if one had the know how). They prefer instead a bit of hot water and lemon to cure all that ails. Needless to say that having a cold over here sucks, as the strongest thing they seem to have is just aspirin . Though the colds over here are the watered down version of what we have back home, so maybe there is something to not using enough drugs to knock out a horse.
                           

Anyway, due to the fact that I am always up for an adventure, that WEBMD has steered me wrong in the past, that I have to yell at small children for a job and that Luke was going to the town with the hospital for class today- I decided to jump on the ol' hypochondriac train and get myself down to the nearest hospital to complain about my sore throat (eye roll).

Turns out, that hospitals are practically closed on the weekend. Front entrance is shut up tighter than a chastity belt, which leaves only the emergency entrance. I kept thinking why on earth would anyone go to a hospital without any serious injury (chicken soup or otherwise), but our friends and co-workers all went there for a variety of reasons. I went in an felt like a right doofus, saying to the receptionist- "Hello. It's not an emergency (well, duh) but I have a sore throat".

After filling out forms I went into the waiting room, expecting it to be much like back home- people in casts, with nails sticking out of their foreheads or BBQ burns down their seared arms- instead it was just like a doctors waiting room. Full of people who might be sick, but were in no means need of emergency treatment. At least that made me feel a little better.

After an hour or so I got into see a doctor and still felt like an idiot. I knew enough not to be demanding, but if I was back home I would have done a simple, "I've had a pus infected, swollen throat for the last 6 days and I can't swallow, please give me some antibiotics so I can be at my best to yell at people on Tuesday- because swallowing honey isn't working". Instead, I stuck a small strip of paper under my arm. It was awesomely cool- it took my body temperature using little bars that changed colour. The only problem was giving the slightly sweaty strip back to him. After I answered the usual questions, he kept asking me if it was okay to do stuff (mind out of the gutter). May I listen to your heart beat? May I take your blood pressure? All the while I was looking at him strangely thinking "duh, your the doctor, go nuts". Anyway, he examined away and then he was like "you're going to need an X-RAY". I repeated the word x-ray back to him to be sure (I love it in Japanese, it is 'rentogen', which sounds like a ray gun to me so super easy to remember). I really wanted to ask him why the hell he was taking an x-ray for a sore throat, but doctors (also known as Sensei in Japanese) are never questioned.

They were very polite. Asking me to strip off my top half and then put on a sexy grey hospital bonds shirt to have my throat and chest x-rayed (I'm just glad the shirt fit). After that was done it was a bit more waiting and then the doctor came out to talk to me.

 "Hmm. We think it's a cold, what would you like to do?" He politely asked.
"Umm, what do you recommend"- I replied, because I didn't know the Japanese for 'I would like to die quietly of shame' (I might have been able to fudge something, but it would have been lost in translation).
"If it gets worse, then on Monday you should see a doctor again."


I nodded and thanked him and made a slightly red and quick exit (and then waited another 35mins before I could pay; Japanese bureaucracy).

So there you have it. $60 later, red faced and diagnosed with a case of a cold (though I am still not convinced that a sore throat before a cold should last 6 days). And the final score is-

WEBMD- 0
Cassie's shame- 1

Autumn

Autumn is one of my favourite seasons in Japan and not just because it provides a much needed break from the summer heat. The temperature is slowly dropping, the heaters are being dusted out, and the coloured leaves are carpeting the roads.

The four seasons that Japan gets is one of my favourite reasons for living here. In Queensland, if the leaves start falling from the trees it is usually due to drought and certainly not a pretty sight. Here, the beautiful colours outside look like a desert sunset- all oranges, yellows and reds. The temperature drops to a mild 10deg (c) in the days (though, it is 5 degs right now), which makes for perfect weather to bring out the macha lattes and hide under a mountain of blankets while watching movies. Which would explain why I have taken a severe lack of photos lately.

Thankfully this year we have been gradually weaned into the colder months, (unlike last year where we went from swimming at the beach to winter wonderland) so it doesn't seem quite so cold. Autumn clothes in Japan is another reason I love it here. Though it can be a bit hit and miss as to whether or not I can squeeze myself into them. For now, leather boots and scarves are the perfect accessories for going outside (at least until winter gets here and I bust out the old ski-jacket again).

The Japanese also really embrace the seasonal food over here. Pumpkin flavoured food is everywhere (and makes me wish I had an oven) and trees all over town are laden with persimmons. The look absolutely beautiful (striking orange fruit hanging from black branches), though not as beautiful as they do in the winter.



There seem to be a lot of persimmon trees growing wild in the Tainai area. I did ask some friends why the monkeys (my old nemeses) don't steal the fruit from the trees (when they are more than happy to rip up all the other vegetable gardens around). Apparently the monkeys can get drunk off them (or so I was told). I have since tried researching to see how accurate this is, but to no avail. Maybe I would have to eat a whole heap of persimmons for some effect. I would like to see a monkey get drunk though, maybe walk its way off of a mountain, or into the sea.  *Sigh* Its a shame they don't eat them, as I am always looking for secret ways that I can get rid of the monkeys (some nights I lie in bed and plot their demise).

The falling of the leaves does signal the season for the bears and the monkeys to get a bit more aggressive. Which (lets face it) is not something I need with my monkey dramas. Snow has already stated falling on the mountains (and in the next town up), and so far the weather report says it will snow here on Saturday. I can only hope that the snow will come and chase the devil spawn back into the mountains permanently, but until then I will sit inside my nicely heated room and watch the leaves fall.

もったいない- Mottainai

Recently, I have been reading a book by a Nobel peace prize winner about Mottainai- which is a concept on wastefulness. It goes beyond just being wasteful though and instead means closer to "a sense of regret concerning waste when the intrinsic value of an object or resource is not properly utilized". It can also refer to wasted and wasteful efforts and actions, activities, time, souls, talents, emotion, minds, dreams, and potential. It astounds me sometimes how the Japanese have such a great way of putting such deep concepts into few words! (I also love the word "yugen"- which is an awareness of the universe that triggers emotional responses too deep and profound for words)


In the old days, the Japanese were very aware of the concept of wastefulness. They had metal things to put on the end of pencils to ensure you used it right down to the numb, you ate every bit of rice down to the last grain and even broken chinaware was repaired. Though in the west we also had the same concepts of wastefulness (hand me downs and left overs, etc), the Japanese go just a little deeper. For example, it is important to eat every grain of rice not just because of wastefulness, because it is the product of a farmer's labour, a labour of love and hard work. The bento (lunchbox) that your mum made you that you left on the train is not just a waste of food, but more importantly wasteful of your mother's love and feelings.





Mottainai can also apply to people too. If you are not utilizing your talents at work ( eg- if you speak three languages, or are a beautiful painter), that is also mottainai, because you are wasting some important skills.


Obviously this can apply to the more materialistic as well- Japan's agricultural ministry estimates that 23 million tons of food were discarded in 2007, about ¥11 trillion ($120 billion) worth, which is the monetary equivalent of Japan's annual agricultural output. Moreover, it cost ¥2 trillion ($21 billion) to process that waste.

Certainly food for thought....

Halloweenies

When I was a kid I was obsessed with lollies. They were such little jubes of heaven that having three square meals a day of pure sugar would be an ideal meal plan (Mind you, this comes from the girl who once got into a bag of flour). So when I used to watch all those American T.V Halloween specials, I used to look upon the screen with tears of longing in my eyes, wondering why I can't dress up for a night and come home with a bag full of candy goodness.

I always put this down to many reasons- the first of which was that I lived in a rural area, so unless I wanted to get Mum to drive me from house to house, it probably wasn't going to happen. The second, and the one that seems much more prominent now- is that I live in Australia.

Nevertheless, one year Mum and I came to an agreement. I would dress up and ring the front door bell, and she would give me a bag of chocolates. It was a deal that worked out splendidly and now makes me wonder why I didn't think of it before. I'm pretty sure that my costume at the time was me wrapped in toilet paper- something to this effect.



But the desired chocolaty outcome was still achieved.

However this year I can proudly say, that it was not only my very first Halloween, but also my second (Ahh the fun of working at two different schools). For some reason the Japanese really embrace Halloween over here, or at least the English schools do. I suppose it is no surprise given we use American spelling (shudder) and American text books.

Getting into the full Halloween spirit over here consists of the same ingredients as what I imagine would be in 'Merica. Namely getting loaded up on chocolate (though, not as much as the kiddies) and running around like a crazy person- Or in my case crazy Polar Bear. I did have a proper jack o lanter carving experience. As you can see, my awesome vision didn't turn out quite so well in pumpkin form. I think I was going for vampire....




We also got to build a haunted house, which was pretty scary with the lights off for the kiddies. However not quite as scary as some of the Gaijins hiding within. Luckily, with the lure of enough candy you can get even the most timid child through...





Happy Halloween everyone.Time to slaughter the livestock and disguise oneself against harmful spirits.

Obligation family- a lesson in Japanese

The other day when I was in Japanese class I was telling a story about my family and needed to know the word for Sister in law. My teacher told me that it was 'Giri no imoto'. I thought to myself for a second that I know the word for sister 'imoto', and I have heard the word 'giri' before- at Valentines day. If you might remember one of my earlier posts 'giri choco' is the obligation chocolate that you have to give co-workers to keep in their good graces. This made me laugh- was it the same word that is used for 'Giri no imoto'?  My Japanese teacher wasn't quite sure, but we have since found out that yes- it is Obligation Sister. Perhaps in Japanese, obligation doesn't have the same negative connotations that it does in English.

At least I can be glad that to me, my in laws are in no way an obligation.

Death to all monkeys!

So, less than 6 months ago I was sitting here typing how special it is to be surrounded by such beautiful wildlife~

 How things have changed.

There a plenty of snakes around here, but most are not poisonous, so I don't mind them. There are bears too, but they tend to stick in the woods so far (touch wood), and I do remind myself of the old song~ If you go into the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise~ so I figure I won't venture into their territory.

 The monkeys, however, are making me want to go out and come back looking something like this.


You see, the monkeys around here are becoming a bit of a problem. They started off as an, 'oh monkey, Y U steal all the vegetables from the gardens'.



But since then, things have turned far more sinister... Now it is at the stage where I am running into the house, locking the doors and peeking through closed blinds and then darting into the corner to huddle in the foetal position. And before you think I am over reacting, they DO break into houses....

So when did this (I believe rational) Maimouphobia (fear of monkeys) begin? Well, it started a few weeks ago with three of the big male monkeys went charging after Luke as he was walking up near his school. At first we were all like 'wow, that was pretty intense'. Next, when they would charge the car we drove by, we thought 'You so silly monkeys'.

But the other week whilst on our morning walk, we encountered a troupe of 10.  At first we thought, just don't make eye contact and keep walking and all will be fine. Treating them much in the same way as many other animals in the 'leave us alone, and we'll leave you alone'. Yeah right. Before we knew it a troupe of 10 charged us- hissing and spitting through their dripping fangs. These weren't the cute little monkeys you see on TV, nor are they the lovable nappy wearing chimps that fetch you snacks out of the fridge (Oh how I wouldn't mind those). Nope, these are the bright red arse, yellow fanged spawn straight from the pits of hell...


So, Luke takes off first (this is running up the hill), with the hissing hell spawn baring their fangs and charging us. I take a look over my shoulder and the big alpha is almost on me, ready to pounce and tear at my face. So I yell out for Luke. Like a gallant knight, he stops and starts flailing his arms and legs, hissing and spitting right back as we do a weird backwards run up the hill (a great glute workout though- not to mention all the adrenaline). Luckily, they gave up after a little bit. Though it did mean that our 40 min walk turned into a 1hr 20min as we were forced to backtrack and went very the long way home. It was actually very lucky, as about 200mtrs behind us there was a little obaasan (grandma), who, if she would have gotten there first would probably be monkey breakfast by now.

We thought that was the end of it though and that they might move on. Not so lucky. Even today, about 5 minutes after I had sent Luke off on his way to work, I heard the front door open and Luke returning for his 'monkey whacking stick' (It is sad that one must have a stick kept for this purpose). I was a little worried about him, so told him I would follow him in the car should things turn bad.

There, around the next bend, the hell creatures loitered for any unsuspecting passers by. The big one saw Luke and made a few motions to charge, but every time Luke swung the stick in the air, the devil spawn hesitated. It was a stand off. I, in the meantime sat safely in the car, with my foot at the ready to floor it and protect my husband if needed. However the monkey was smart... Too smart, maybe, and stayed put. So Luke got in the car and I floored it straight towards the monkey, hoping to scare them off the road and into the woods- away from people walking. But the demon creature snarled and then lunged at the car... Needless to say, I gunned it up the hill pretty fast to drop Luke off. But the problem came from having to get back home. Thankfully, I hadn't locked the house (it is Japan) so I knew I could just run inside, but when I drove past the monkeys again, they did another lunge for the car. I planted my foot and drove the rest of the way like lightening (it was only about 200mtrs to my house from where they skulked), all the while checking the rearview mirror in case a snarling monkey had  lunged onto the boot of the car, T2 style, and was trying to terminate me. Or that the troupe would turn the corner, still hissing a silent vengeance under their rancid breath.

Three minutes later, with all the doors in the house firmly locked, I sit down to settle my heart beat a little and look outside....




Monkeys. Everywhere.

My house was surrounded (There are more moving into position as I took this shot). I know primates were supposed to be smart, but could they really read a licence plate from a car? Did they know it was me? Is this really when and how I die? By some obscure death by monkeys. Or do I become the twitchy shut in for the rest of my life, opening the blinds just a crack to ensure that I live another day. All the while huddled on the floor in the foetal position, crying "Can't sleep, monkeys will eat me." You can guess my surprise when one of the shifty creatures sat a metre away (where the first wall is in the picture) from my window and looked in like it wanted to avenge the death of a loved one. All I needed now was thunder and lightening to flash behind it, and the monkey drenched with rain and dripping with the stench of vengeance....

But I am happy to report the monkeys are moving on. Though, that won't stop me from carrying a kitchen knife when I have to run out to the car later to go to work.

I now can't help but reminisce on how it was not long ago that I was creeping so quietly up to them to take a quick photo of the precious, precious darlings.

 Now I say- Death to all monkeys...